You have this space with four walls, floors, a roof over your head and everything you need. This house can hold all your things, has a bed, kitchen, bathrooms, and all the behind the scenes systems are in working order. This is a house, an apartment, condo or whatever you want to call it. But is this “home?” Are you excited to go home after work, or after a long vacation? When it comes to describing what makes a house a home for me, it’s simple.
Home is where the people and fur babies I love are, and where we’ve made our cozy little nook in the world. It’s a reflection of our lives together and the places we’ve come from. It’s as individual as we are. Home simply makes me happy and I feel completely at ease.
So what makes you happy? Is it that plush bedding that makes it impossible to get out of bed? Or is it a surround sound system for your movies and the convenient location to all the snacks you want? Or possibly the photos and mementoes on the wall and shelves reminding you of perfect days gone by? Or is it your collection of Destiny and Star Wars figurines that make you happy? I know those make my husband happy! Whatever it is that puts a smile on your face, go for it! Don’t let anyone else dictate to you what should and shouldn’t be in YOUR home.
This even goes for relationships. A house should never fully be the realization of one person living there. Then it doesn’t feel like home for anyone else because they are not represented. Communicate with one another about what each of you need and want to make it feel like home. Then work your ass off to accommodate those needs. I know this is easier said than done. Trust me, I know! But this home should be all of yours. This home belongs to all of you. To you, your spouse, your partner, your kids and even your pets.
For example, Tealy loves being under things. I think it has something to do with the Australian Cattle Dog in her. The last bed frame I had, and used for about 6 years, was a storage bed. So there was maybe three inches from the floor to the base of the bed frame. We could tell she always hated not being able to escape somewhere. So when it came time for us to buy a new bed, we looked specifically for a bed frame that sits up off the floor she could fit under. I’m sure there are a few of you out there shaking your heads now, all like “who the hell buys a bed with their dog in mind?!” and you would be right. But making my pup happy, and seeing the white tips of her little feet sticking out from under the bed in the morning puts a smile on my face. And that’s what makes my home like no one else’s.
Go find what makes your place home, and hold onto it. Be ready for the evolution, because it doesn’t happen all at once. Just the same as how you have taken years to become who you are now and will change with each passing experience. Most importantly, enjoy the process and try not to stress about it or be defeated by comparing yours to someone else’s. Comparison is the death of joy, and joy is how a house becomes a home.
Last modified: September 27, 2017